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nursedarryLet me start off this rant by saying if I could be bothered, I'd strip Padme's picture right off this icon. As most of you may have already guessed, she, Chiani (the televised version- I don't easily see Sean Young as a mum) and I all have something in common.
Or we did, that is before GL got to Padme. She is officially removed from the hallowed halls of boy-girl twin mum-dom. Not only did she not carry twins in an appropriate manner (i.e. have a twin-sized bump, gain 40lbs and have upper arms the size of her thighs) her death in childbirth had nothing to do with the kids or eating huge quantities of Spice or Oreos (luckily for me death by Oreos isn't permanent). Also, my kids looked a lot more realistic as newborns than L & L (and Leto and Ghani, for that matter).
1. When did Anakin EVEH have any redeeming qualities to lose? WTF did she see in him? And talk about wooden acting. YUK!
2. Someone needs to send Obi-Wan some "Just for Men", 'cause the next twenty years aren't kind to him. See how nice Padme looked all through the last twenty years. She and Anakin must also have very different metabolisms for her to retain the same look whilst he goes from annoying toddler to annoying youth. Having said that, Owen and Beru don't fare too well either. Remind me to build a spa on Tatooine.
3. CONTINUIT-WHO? Real mother? Must have been a blue ghostie mum (pardon me,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
dandelow:) And speaking of The Big Blue Ghostie, Why is it important to know that Q-G isn't mostly dead but only kinda dead? Is that so we can buy the whole heart-to-heart on a log that Luke has with Ben in RotJ? I was willing to suspend my disbelief for that; now I have to fit THAT little piece into this ever-expanding jigsaw.
4. Ian must have let out a shout of "FINALLY!" when he read this script. I know I was thinking it:) Aside from his scenes, I agree completely withpyrifera's and kilter's reviews. There were just two other scenes in the whole movie- "wuv you" and bad Jedi one-liners. BTW, Palpy and I have wrecked the Senate far worse than that...and we weren't even fighting...
5. Production designers- hello??? Alderaan looked far too much like northern Naboo.
6. THE CLINCHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't stop sniggering through the second half of the film because in one scene I just lost it. Who here has seen "Animal House"? Remember the scene when the new pledges to the Delta house are given their pins and new Delta Tau Chi names? John Belushi says "You're Delta Tau Chai name is Greenbean", etc. (Okay, maybe he didnt' say "Greenbean" and I just made that up after readingpyrifera's post about BG.) Anyhoo, he gets to Tom Hulce and says "Your Delta Tau Chi name is Pinto." and TH says "Why Pinto?" And John Belushi lets out this massive belch and says "Why not?"
C'mon, just picture it...we got to the point where Palpatine is telling Ani:
"You're Sith name is..." I could just see Ani say "Why Darth Vader?"
"BURRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!!! Why not?"
Okay, I guess you had to be there.
What else...I was also looking at my watch, but more in respect of the babysitter than the film- luckily my kids slept the whole time we were at the cinema. They're so good- comes from being delivered by a human midwife, rather than a droid, I guess.
Finally and more seriously, I hope that my viewing of the original trilogy won't be marred by these films, now. I almost wish GL hadn't made them and we were left to use our own highly creative imaginations rather than have to rely on this claptrap as backstory.
And in deference to a few good actors with some shitty scripts- you did the best you could guys. Now go out there and do some real cinema.
Or we did, that is before GL got to Padme. She is officially removed from the hallowed halls of boy-girl twin mum-dom. Not only did she not carry twins in an appropriate manner (i.e. have a twin-sized bump, gain 40lbs and have upper arms the size of her thighs) her death in childbirth had nothing to do with the kids or eating huge quantities of Spice or Oreos (luckily for me death by Oreos isn't permanent). Also, my kids looked a lot more realistic as newborns than L & L (and Leto and Ghani, for that matter).
1. When did Anakin EVEH have any redeeming qualities to lose? WTF did she see in him? And talk about wooden acting. YUK!
2. Someone needs to send Obi-Wan some "Just for Men", 'cause the next twenty years aren't kind to him. See how nice Padme looked all through the last twenty years. She and Anakin must also have very different metabolisms for her to retain the same look whilst he goes from annoying toddler to annoying youth. Having said that, Owen and Beru don't fare too well either. Remind me to build a spa on Tatooine.
3. CONTINUIT-WHO? Real mother? Must have been a blue ghostie mum (pardon me,
dandelow:) And speaking of The Big Blue Ghostie, Why is it important to know that Q-G isn't mostly dead but only kinda dead? Is that so we can buy the whole heart-to-heart on a log that Luke has with Ben in RotJ? I was willing to suspend my disbelief for that; now I have to fit THAT little piece into this ever-expanding jigsaw.4. Ian must have let out a shout of "FINALLY!" when he read this script. I know I was thinking it:) Aside from his scenes, I agree completely with
pyrifera's and kilter's reviews. There were just two other scenes in the whole movie- "wuv you" and bad Jedi one-liners. BTW, Palpy and I have wrecked the Senate far worse than that...and we weren't even fighting...5. Production designers- hello??? Alderaan looked far too much like northern Naboo.
6. THE CLINCHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't stop sniggering through the second half of the film because in one scene I just lost it. Who here has seen "Animal House"? Remember the scene when the new pledges to the Delta house are given their pins and new Delta Tau Chi names? John Belushi says "You're Delta Tau Chai name is Greenbean", etc. (Okay, maybe he didnt' say "Greenbean" and I just made that up after reading
pyrifera's post about BG.) Anyhoo, he gets to Tom Hulce and says "Your Delta Tau Chi name is Pinto." and TH says "Why Pinto?" And John Belushi lets out this massive belch and says "Why not?" C'mon, just picture it...we got to the point where Palpatine is telling Ani:
"You're Sith name is..." I could just see Ani say "Why Darth Vader?"
"BURRRRRRRRRRRRRP!!!!!! Why not?"
Okay, I guess you had to be there.
What else...I was also looking at my watch, but more in respect of the babysitter than the film- luckily my kids slept the whole time we were at the cinema. They're so good- comes from being delivered by a human midwife, rather than a droid, I guess.
Finally and more seriously, I hope that my viewing of the original trilogy won't be marred by these films, now. I almost wish GL hadn't made them and we were left to use our own highly creative imaginations rather than have to rely on this claptrap as backstory.
And in deference to a few good actors with some shitty scripts- you did the best you could guys. Now go out there and do some real cinema.
Ping
Date: 2005-05-27 04:35 pm (UTC)And he has a sexy scar.
Re: Ping
Date: 2005-05-27 04:50 pm (UTC)